So Ive been re-evaluating how I view/understand horses. Up until about 2007 horses were a tool, an object that you train and use to mold into what you want them to do. (This was after I was done training/teaching but I still thought that way) I thought communicators and the people that use them were nuts. If your horse didn't want to do the job you wanted it to do you sold it and bought one that would work, or put it in training until it learned the job. By any means necessary........
And then the CW incident that rocked the WP world... I looked at the photos and was horrified. I truly wondered how someone who was with horses every day could do something like that to another living being.
And then I started thinking about it. How was I any different? Ive tied horses around so hard they've popped ribs out of place. Ive ripped the side out of a 2 year olds face until she was bleeding, just to get her to round better. Ive ridden a 3yo with cinch galls so bad they didn't heal for the entire month that I had him in training, and I kept riding him. Ive left marks on horses sides from spurs. Ive tied up horses for hours.
I went to the QH shows, and watched the spurring and jerking that went on for hours, and said nothing. In fact at one point I was the person on the rail yelling at the kids to jerk more, spur more.
It makes me sick to think of what I have done.
Alot of things have helped me change my actions, some were local, some were futher away. The 2yo that I ripped the face off of never became a pleasure horse and lives 20 min away, I cry just about every time I see her. I started reading Mugwump http://mugwumpchronicles.blogspot.com/ I kept hearing an echo of my own thoughts when she talked about giving up training. And I started thinking that maybe winning wasn't that important if you thought that the means to get there were too much.
So maybe I'm trying to make up for it by spoiling Lucas. To make sure that he enjoys being a horse, and that he gets fun stuff to do. We don't work hard very often. At shows we're the ones out eating grass on his days off from showing. I try to use my dressage rather than my pleasure back ground when I ride. Hes been a horse who's had a pampered but hard, abusive life. Maybe me helping him will make up for some of the things I've done to other horses.
4 comments:
I've done some things I'm really ashamed of too. My 4-H leader taught me the "easy" way to do things and I did exactly what I was told. When I think about the things I used to do to my horse when he had the bit in his mouth... I just cringe.
The important thing is that we've moved past those methods and what what's best for our horses now.
Most of the time I feel like I'm spoiling Lilly too... everyone else is working the crap out of their horse before a class and I'm letting mine stand at the trailer eating hay until the last minute. After riding her for 30 minutes I feel bad and decide she's probably had enough.
I'd rather be on that end of the spectrum than where I used to be, though.
Lucas is lucky to have you. :)
You recognize your past and are moving forward in a more positive and loving way. I think that Lucas is the perfect "teacher" for you. :-)
Thanks girls, its been a year of thinking about things differently. And its starting to pay off, but sometimes you just have to hash it out on paper or well.. keyboard
You are to be commended for your honesty. I come from the hunter/jumper world, and there's some atrocious treatment of horses there too. Don't worry too much about the past - you can't change it - just use what you know now to move forwards in a better way with your horses - we're all on this journey.
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